Volume 37:
Coens, Korines and Carruths
Inside Llewyn Davis
Dir: Joel & Ethan Coen – Planned
release date: TBA
I did not know
how much I missed the Coen Brothers until I saw this first teaser for their new
film Inside Llewyn Davis. And oh,
boy, does it turn out I miss them so. No one else makes a movie quite like they
do, and I was excited to see this movie from the moment that nice young man
with the cat compliments Oscar Isaac and his folk music. Inside Llewyn Davis is apparently about a New York folk musician in
the ’60s who never quite finds all that much success. It may seem like an odd
fit for the Coens at first, but it did not take long for this trailer to sell
me. First of all there’s the cast, which features the sort-of Drive reunion of Isaac and Carey
Mulligan as well as Justin Timberlake, Garrett Hedlund and more. (Also, as this
is a Coen Brothers movie, John Goodman shows up to bluster on about some
nonsense.) Most of us probably won’t see this sucker until later in the year,
but with this I can at least rest assured that a new movie by the Coens exists.
That alone is reason to go on living.
Spring Breakers
Dir: Harmony Korine – Planned release
date: March 22
Well, this looks
like some nonsense, doesn’t it? At the very least, it’s hard for me to take a
movie too seriously when the phrase “spring break” is repeated in the trailer
about 3 billion times as if it’s supposed to mean something. Also, the work of
Harmony Korine has never appealed to me in the slightest, and the casting of
Disney mainstays Selena Gomez and Vanessa Hudgens as two scantily clad party
girls seems just a bit too calculated. Despite all this, I’m kind of interested
in seeing how this one turns out. (And no, not for the reasons you’re thinking,
ya weirdo.) So long as Korine doesn’t pretend that this ode to bikinis,
drinking and guns has any real depth, I could see this being a good-looking,
admirably bonkers piece of junk. James Franco certainly looks to be having
waaaay too much fun, but if the rest of the movie shares his cartoonish
enthusiasm there might be something to this. The one thing it can’t do is
pretend that the story of a bunch of girls going to Florida, robbing a
restaurant, joining up with a drug dealer (?) and then getting shot at is
something to be taken seriously. Considering the man in charge, I’m not sure
how much faith I have that this won’t be the case.
Red 2
Dir: Dean Parisot – Planned release date:
August 2
Wow. I had
completely forgotten Red existed
until I saw this trailer. And what a terrible movie it was, too. I’m sure a
sequel must be alluring to somebody,
but I can assure you it’s not me. This trailer seems to just continue down the
same road that was paved by the original; there are some fun moments of the
various past-their-prime spies bickering about their violent professions, but
once the action actually starts it’s more likely to put the audience to sleep
than get them on the edge of their seats. There’s also the profoundly
uninspired choice of “Everybody Wants You” as the soundtrack doesn’t seem to
suggest that this sequel atones for the absolute lack of creativity seen the
original. Even the choice of villain—Korean action star Lee Byung-hun—feels
ridiculously calculated. You’ve got to get the overseas grosses, you see. If
the movie turns out to be two hours of hanging out with John Malkovich’s
character, it may turn out all right. Otherwise, ew.
Olympus Has Fallen
Dir: Antoine Fuqua – Planned release
date: March 22
Watching the
trailer for Olympus Has Fallen, I
came to a horrifying realization: there are two movies with the same exact
premise coming out this year. When I clicked play, I thought for sure I was
about to watch the preview for Roland Emmerich’s White House Down, which is about what happens when the White House
is overrun by a terrorists and it’s up to one Secret Service agent to save the
President. I merely assumed the title had changed to Olympus Has Fallen. It took me about 30 seconds to realize THEY ARE
TWO DIFFERENT MOVIES. This one comes out in March, is directed by Antoine
Fuqua, and it stars Gerard Butler as a Secret Service agent who must save
President Aaron Eckhart when the White House is overrun. Emmerich’s White House Down comes out in June, and
stars Channing Tatum as a Secret Service Agent who must save President Jamie
Foxx when the White House is overrun. Boy, you cannot imagine the sinking sensation I felt when I made this
discovery. I sorely hope that previews for White
House Down come out in time to be shown in front of Olympus Has Fallen. Because screw you, audiences.
Upstream Color
Dir: Shane Carruth – Planned release
date: April 5
Reaction
Nine years after
Shane Carruth puzzled the world with his debut film Primer, he’s back and more gloriously confusing than ever with Upstream Color. It debuted at Sundance
and was met with mostly positive reviews—some of them proclaiming
“masterpiece”—and I can certainly see how that could be the case. But oh boy, if you thought The Master was opaque. Even those who
saw Upstream Color and loved it don’t
seem to be entirely sure what the movie is about, and that’s probably just how
Carruth likes it. After all, "you can force your story’s shape, but the color
will always bloom upstream." That means something, doesn’t it? Maybe. Or perhaps
it’s all a bunch of hooey. We’ll find out once the film starts rolling out in
April, and even there it gets weird: Carruth is self-distributing this sucker. You
can’t do anything the normal way, can you Shane?
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