With
the release of The Avengers this
weekend, summer movie season has officially begun. So, huzzah. For the next few months, we
are going to be bombarded with sequels, blockbusters, and movies with a lot of
explosions and stuff. Last year’s offerings were on the mild side—there was a handful of good movies but nothing that felt
like required viewing—and Hollywood seems to be making up for it in 2012. May’s lineup isn't great, but once we hit June it seems like a hotly
anticipated film is released every week. In this post, I shall take you through
all that these next few months have to offer; what I’m excited for, what I’m
dreading, and everything in between.
May
Yay!
Believe
it or not, there was once a time when film fans we’re actually really excited
by the prospect of a new Tim Burton film. This has waned quite a bit in the
last few years, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t intrigued by Dark
Shadows. I thoroughly enjoyed the trailer, and I like the idea of
Burton returning to less family-centric fare. The material isn’t much of a
stretch for him, but perhaps ditching the candy colors of Alice in Woderland and Charlie
and the Chocolate Factory in favor of a slightly darker palette will serve
him well. Outside of that, there’s not a whole lot in May that gets me really
excited. The exception is the release of Wes Anderson’s Moonrise Kingdom at the
end of the month. Anderson is a filmmaker I mostly enjoy, but if this latest
goes as far off the Andersonian deep end as the trailer makes it seem, I may be
more annoyed than charmed.
Nay!
The
obvious target this month is Battleship, a film that just looks
intolerable despite the caliber of talent that seemed to find this project
worthwhile. The mere fact that “From Hasbro, the company that brought you Transformers!” is being used as a
selling point just depresses me. What a profoundly lame movie it appears to be,
and hopefully audiences don’t encourage the studios by going out to see it like
I fear they will. There’s also the silly-looking Chernobyl Diaries, which
was written and produced by Paranormal
Activity’s Oren Peli. This is just more proof that the success of that film
may have done more harm than good.
Maybe!
After
the massive success of Borat, Sacha
Baron Cohen lost a lot of goodwill with his follow-up Bruno. As a result, his latest The Dictator is now a fully-scripted
comedy about a foreign tyrant who comes to America and gets into all sorts of
fish-out-of-water shenanigans. I think Baron Cohen is talented, but nothing
about this film really has me intrigued. I’m similarly hopeful-yet-reserved about
Men
in Black 3. I liked the first two films (that’s right, both of them!) but this just
seems like an example of Hollywood needlessly resurrecting a franchise from the
dead. Finally, we’ll see if the whole “ensemble comedy based on a self-help
book” trend is still a thing with the release of What To Expect When You’re
Expecting.
June
Yay!
The
obvious one here is Prometheus, Ridley Scott’s eagerly anticipated return to the Alien universe that isn’t technically an
alien prequel. The marketing thus far has been terrific—if a but overzealous—but
I worry that people’s expectations are getting a little too high here. It’s not
like Scott has made a great film in a very long time, but if he’s going to do
it again it’s probably going to be this one. There’s also Brave, Pixar’s potential
return to “good” filmmaking after last year’s reviled Cars 2. However, let’s be honest: that film was their only real
misstep. It’d be silly to expect that to become the new trend. If I had to pick
one more June release that I’m really excited for, it’d be Steven Soderbergh’s male
stripper movie Magic Mike. I would not have said that two months ago, but here
we are.
Nay!
When
I initially heard that the new Adam Sandler That’s My Boy would be
R-rated rather than safe and PG or PG-13, I was actually somewhat excited. “This
could be a chance for Sandler to let himself off the leash,” I thought,
foolishly. Then I saw the trailer, and does this ever look like just another
lazy Happy Madison production. The only difference is that the raunch factor is
turned up a bit. The good news is that Dennis Dugan isn’t directing, so there’s
that. The bad news is that it still looks like it was shot on an iPhone. Timur
Bekmambetov’s Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter looks decidedly more cinematic,
but it also makes me feel like a 70 year old man. I understand it’s based on a
book, but I have zero interest in such silliness.
Maybe!
Snow
White and the Huntsman, the “grittier” of this year’s Snow Whites, doesn’t
look all that interesting based on the previews. It doesn’t look horrid, but rather
bland and derivative. I’m still holding out hope, but I doubt it will ever be
more than a solid ‘B.’ Based on the previews, Rock of Ages looks pretty
darn silly, but the best case scenario is that it becomes a fun kind of silly.
If so, I probably would have genuine fun with it. Other films on the “cautiously
optimistic” list include the sure-to-be-ridiculous Piranha 3DD, Woody Allen’s
To
Rome with Love, and the newly Dwayne Johnson-ified G.I. Joe: Retaliation.
Also out in June: Madagascar 3: Europe’s Most Wanted, Safety Not Guaranteed, Seeking a Friend for the End of the World,
Madea’s Witness Protection and People Like Us.
July
Yay!
I
don’t know if you’ve heard of it, but Christopher Nolan has a new film coming
out this year. It’s called… wait, let me check… oh yeah: The Dark Knight Rises. I’m
reasonably excited for that, I don’t know about you. There are also a couple
comedies coming out this month that seem promising. There’s the newly-titled The
Watch, which was originally titled Neighborhood
Watch before a guy down in Florida had to go and ruin everybody’s fun. I’m
still a bit surprised they haven’t shelved the film outright, but I suspect it’s
too much of a financial investment for the studio to back out. My anticipation
of Seth MacFarlane’s Ted is based entirely on the funny
red-band trailer, and if it can sustain such raunchy silliness I have high
hopes.
Nay!
July
is actually a pretty darn stacked month this year, and there aren’t many
releases since every week there seems to be a massive blockbuster coming out.
(Unsurprisingly, the studios are staying as far away as possible from July 20,
which gives us The Dark Knight Rises.)
If I had to pick on two films, they’d be the wholly unnecessary Ice
Age: Continental Drift and Step Up Revolution. I have no
quarrel with either film, but I am also not seeing them. I would be remiss if I
didn’t bring up the new concert documentary Katy Perry: Part of Me 3-D,
and if I wasn’t a gentleman I’m sure I could make a few childish jokes about
that title.
Maybe!
Something
strange has happened with The Amazing Spider-Man: I’ve
actually grown less interested
in the film the closer we’ve gotten to release. I like every last person
involved in it, but the more footage I see the more I’m saddened by the need to
reboot this series so soon. The whole “realistic Spider-Man” angle also rubs me
the wrong way. Sure, you have mechanical web shooters. You also have a giant
CGI lizard-man, so I don’t think you’re as gritty as you think you are. I might
actually be more intrigued by Oliver Stone’s Savages, which looks
really violent and stupid but that’s a huge improvement over the gutless
silliness we’ve seen out of his last several films. Finally, Rodrigo Cortes’ Red
Lights certainly looks intriguing, but when it screened at Sundance it
wasn’t met with a ton of praise. In fact, the ending actively angered some
people.
August
Yay!
Since
July was light on new releases, Hollywood has decided to dump a whole lot on us
in August. Most of it looks like it could be reasonable brain-dead
entertainment, but not a ton of it sticks out to me as something I’m really
pumped for. Honestly, one of my more anticipated August releases is The
Expendables 2. As dumb as it was, I actually really enjoyed the
original, and removing Sylvester Stallone from the director’s chair might
actually make this one a better movie. Jay Roach’s political comedy The
Campaign has a ton of potential, and casting Will Ferrell and Zach
Galifianakis as electoral enemies should be good for several laughs. Finally,
Shia LaBeouf—a decent actor who’s mostly chosen bad movies—begins his post-Transformers career with Lawless,
which just released a good-looking trailer. I’ll also throw in a shout out to ParaNorman,
a stop-motion film that seems to have a lot of potential.
Nay!
The
trailer for Len Wiseman’s remake of Total Recall makes it look incredibly
boring, and not even my never-ending love for Bryan Cranston can get me excited
for it. So imagine my surprise when I read it was one of the more expensive
movies of the year, yet nobody I know has any interest. If I must pick on one
more, it would probably be The Odd Life of Timothy Green, which
just looks silly and manipulative. Mostly silly.
Maybe!
I’ve
been dreading The Bourne Legacy for a while, even if Jeremy Renner is a great
choice to replace Matt Damon. My problem lies more with the impatience of the
whole thing. Can’t we just let the original three Bourne films live without immediately rushing out a fourth? Like The Amazing Spider-Man, it may wind up
good but it still has no reason to exist. One other film I’m intrigued by is Premium
Rush, which was obviously pushed back to capitalize on the post-Dark Knight Rises Joseph Gordon-Levitt
love. Or something. I saw a trailer for this movie last year and I didn’t hate
it, so that’s something.
Also out in August: Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Dog Days, Hope Springs, Sparkle, Hit and Run, 7500.
-------------
This
has been my trip through the summer months. Will my high expectations be
rewarded? Will I be pleasantly surprised by the comedic genius of That’s My Boy? Stay tuned to this blog
to find out!
No comments:
Post a Comment